Your Story & Why You Wrote It
Q: Why did you write Held in the Dark? A: Because I’ve sat in the dark too. When a child you love is struggling with an eating disorder, the fear, the helplessness, and the isolation can feel unbearable — and most resources leave parents behind. I wrote this book for the parent who is desperate for someone to speak honestly into their experience, not just hand them a clinical checklist. You needed a guide, a companion, and a reminder that you are not alone. That’s what I wanted this book to be.
Q: Are you speaking from personal experience? A: Yes. This book was born out of my own walk through the painful and disorienting experience of loving a child with an eating disorder. I’m also a certified mental health coach with a degree in Scripture and Theology, so I’ve brought everything I know — personally and professionally — into these pages. But at its heart, I am first and foremost a parent who has been right where you are.
Understanding Eating Disorders in Adolescents
Q: Is this book clinically accurate? Will it help me understand what my child is going through medically? A: While I am a certified mental health coach, I am not a physician or licensed therapist, and this book is not a clinical manual. What it will do is help you understand the emotional landscape of eating disorders — the shame, the secrecy, the distorted thinking — in a way that makes your child’s behavior feel less bewildering and more human. I always encourage parents to build a professional treatment team alongside their own personal growth journey.
Q: My child has just been diagnosed. Is it too early to read this book? A: No — in fact, the early days may be when you need it most. The shock of a new diagnosis can leave parents feeling paralyzed. Held in the Dark is designed to meet you exactly where you are, whether you’re in crisis mode or somewhere further down the road.
Q: Does this book address specific eating disorders like anorexia, bulimia, or ARFID? A: The principles and insights in this book apply broadly to the eating disorder experience rather than focusing on one specific diagnosis. Every family’s journey is unique, but the emotional terrain parents walk — grief, fear, guilt, hope — is remarkably shared regardless of the specific diagnosis.
How to Use the Book / What to Expect
Q: What can I expect when I read Held in the Dark? A: Honesty. Hope. And a hand to hold in the hard places. This is not a book that will minimize what you’re going through or offer easy answers. But it will walk with you from the shock and isolation of early discovery toward strength, community, and renewed hope — and it will point you back to the One who holds you both in the dark.
Q: Can I read this on my own, or is it meant for a group? A: Both! Many parents will find it most powerful to read privately, at their own pace, especially in vulnerable seasons. But it also works beautifully in a small-group setting — a support group, a church community, or even between two parents walking similar roads.
Q: Is there a companion resource or workbook? A: (Update this answer based on what you do or don’t have available — a study guide, journal prompts, etc.)
How to Support Your Child
Q: Will this book tell me what to say to my child? A: It will help you become the kind of parent your child needs — present, grounded, and rooted in love rather than fear. You’ll find language and perspective that can shift the way you show up, though I always encourage parents to work alongside a professional therapist who knows your child personally.
Q: I’m terrified of saying the wrong thing and making things worse. Is that addressed? A: Absolutely — and that fear is one of the most common things parents carry. One of my goals in writing this book was to help you move from walking on eggshells to walking in confidence. You don’t have to be perfect. You just have to stay.
Q: What if my spouse and I are not on the same page about how to handle this? A: That is more common than you might think, and it’s addressed in the book. An eating disorder puts enormous strain on a marriage and family system. I hope Held in the Dark opens the door to honest conversation between partners and gives you a shared foundation to stand on.
Faith-Based Perspective & Theology
Q: Do I have to be a Christian to benefit from this book? A: Held in the Dark was not written from a faith perspective, nor does it teach from Scripture. What you will find are honest, personal moments in which I share how my own faith sustained me through one of the hardest seasons of my life. Those glimpses are part of my story — but this book was written for every parent, regardless of your beliefs.
Q: How does faith fit into an eating disorder recovery journey? A: I believe that healing is holistic — body, mind, and soul — and that a parent’s spiritual foundation matters deeply in the long, hard work of supporting a child through recovery. Faith won’t replace professional treatment, but it can be the anchor that keeps you from drowning while you wait and fight and hope.
Q: I’m angry at God. Is there room for that in this book? A: Yes. I would not insult your pain by pretending that faith is a tidy, comfortable thing in the middle of a crisis. Held in the Dark makes room for the hard questions, the grief, and even the anger — because that is where real faith is forged.
